The world of martial arts recently found itself in the middle of a heated debate after Pastor Dale Partridge publicly discouraged parents from allowing their daughters to practice Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ) or wrestling. His remarks drew criticism from practitioners, parents, and martial artists worldwide—including a powerful rebuttal from retired Navy SEAL commander and BJJ black belt, Jocko Willink.
The Controversial Statement
On social media, Pastor Partridge urged parents to keep their daughters away from grappling-based martial arts, stating:
“Parents, stop putting your daughters into Jiu-Jitsu and wrestling. You’re letting 14-year-old boys grope, mount, and dominate your little girl. Yes, teach them self-defense, but do so with self-awareness and weapons training, not ground fighting.”
When another user suggested that girls could simply train with other girls, Partridge dismissed the idea as “still strange and not feminine.”
His comments quickly went viral, sparking debates about safety, gender roles, and the best methods for teaching young women self-defense.
Jocko Willink’s Strong Response
Jocko Willink, a long-time advocate of martial arts for discipline and self-protection, offered a sharply contrasting perspective:
“Parents, put your daughters into jiu-jitsu and wrestling. That way they will be able to defend themselves against boys trying to grope, mount, and dominate them. It’s comforting when your daughters can choke, maim, or otherwise incapacitate potential attackers.”
Willink’s statement reframed the issue: rather than fearing close contact, he argued that martial arts empowers girls to handle dangerous situations safely and effectively.
Parents and Practitioners Weigh In
The exchange ignited passionate responses from the martial arts community:
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Brianna Stevens, a parent who initially enrolled her daughter in BJJ, shared:
“Put our daughter in jiu-jitsu 2 years ago thinking it would be the only girl. Yanked her immediately. We’ll stick to firearms training.”
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Others, however, praised grappling sports. One parent wrote:
“I train jiu-jitsu with my 14yo son and 10yo daughter in our garage. It’s not optional. I just think of it as a basic physical skill like swimming.”
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Another commenter highlighted the confidence boost wrestling gave his daughter:
“Wrestling has done wonders for her self-esteem and confidence.”
These differing perspectives underscore a broader question: What’s the best way to prepare young women for real-world threats?
BJJ vs. Weapons Training: A False Choice?
Pastor Partridge and some of his supporters insisted that firearms training is more practical. One martial artist agreed:
“Every instructor I have ever had, over decades, said if you had to choose between martial arts training for girls and firearms training, choose firearms.”
However, critics of this view argue that martial arts and weapons training are not mutually exclusive. While firearms can provide protection in some scenarios, BJJ teaches situational awareness, control, and confidence in unarmed combat—skills that are immediately applicable in everyday life.
Professional BJJ coaches also emphasize that safety standards vary by gym. Parents concerned about inappropriate training environments can look for certified academies, such as those affiliated with Gracie University or other reputable organizations, that enforce strict conduct guidelines.
Why BJJ Can Benefit Young Women
Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu is often described as “the gentle art” because it uses leverage, technique, and strategy rather than brute strength. For young women, the benefits are wide-ranging:
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Practical self-defense skills: Learning how to escape from holds, pins, and unwanted physical contact.
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Increased confidence: Overcoming challenges on the mat often translates to greater resilience in daily life.
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Physical fitness: BJJ improves endurance, flexibility, and strength.
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Community and discipline: Training fosters friendships, respect, and mental toughness.
As Jocko Willink noted, the ability to neutralize larger opponents can be life-changing:
“The solution for her is not ‘grapple well,’ it’s shoot, stab, or spray,” said Partridge.
Willink countered with the opposite: “It’s comforting when your daughters can choke, maim, or otherwise incapacitate potential attackers.”
Balancing Safety and Empowerment
While concerns about training environments are valid, dismissing martial arts altogether may limit young women’s opportunities for growth and self-protection. The key lies in responsible coaching, proper oversight, and encouraging girls to train in safe, supportive spaces.
As one martial artist put it:
“Vet the gym and instructors as you should, but jiu-jitsu is amazing for all children.”
Key Takeaways
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Pastor Dale Partridge sparked controversy by discouraging girls from practicing BJJ or wrestling.
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Jocko Willink strongly defended martial arts for girls, highlighting its role in real-world self-defense.
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Parents and practitioners remain divided between firearms training and martial arts, though many experts stress both can be valuable.
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Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu offers young women confidence, fitness, and practical skills for handling threats.
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Choosing a safe, certified gym is crucial for ensuring positive training experiences.
FAQ
Q1: Is Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu safe for young girls?
Yes. When taught in certified academies with proper supervision, BJJ is safe and emphasizes technique over strength.
Q2: Can BJJ really help girls defend themselves?
Absolutely. BJJ equips practitioners with tools to escape, control, and neutralize larger aggressors, making it highly practical for real-world scenarios.
Q3: Should parents choose firearms training over martial arts?
It doesn’t have to be either/or. Firearms training can be valuable, but BJJ builds situational awareness and unarmed defense skills that firearms cannot.
Q4: How can parents find safe BJJ gyms for their daughters?
Look for certified academies with experienced instructors, strong safety protocols, and a positive culture that welcomes women and children.
Suggested Internal Links
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